EVIL

as the title of the song above indicates, this is a blog about EVIL, attitude, things to come.

yes, i know that it is a somewhat obscure retro song, but i am not looking back here, i am full of red angry hipster swing; ready to skip across jazz coloured rooftops "searching for the ancient heavenly connection to the starry dynamo in the machinery of night"(allen ginsberg)

fuck it.

life is not kind. it rains on your parade as you march towards the inevitable. life shits on you when you are down. no-one gets through it without becoming wet and stinky. this is what life does.

i used to think that ironman was an escape from life, that it offered some form of transcendence, a hero's journey, a chance to fantasize through space and time. (sort've like pokemon go).

i was wrong. ironman is life. plain, simple, un-relenting, un-forgiving, painful and not immune to the ravages of the dominos of time.  don't get me wrong...i am not quitting ironman...i am not done with it yet...

i have crossed six full distance finish lines and my dreams are still that, just my dreams...in my head, less and less projected onto the world outside. come to think of it, my dreams are changing into non-dreams, this thing is getting real, and as my ironman reality reifies, the road gets less scenic on the one hand, narrower, with steep cliffs all around. it could become real, it could simply stop becoming. it is tough to say, but the momentum is on me... more boring, exciting, stimulating either way...

i plan to get EVIL as in
 rock'n roll,
 as in kick your ass
 as in be tougher than nails
 as in do what it takes
 as in rebel against the laws of heaven (if not nature)
as in carve my own fate (which is never possible)
as in dance with the trickster
as in salt of the earth, tobacco spitting, republican, feet on the ground in a pick up truck....

oh shit...there i go...dreaming again.

my very first road bike; a steel miele posing in my old living room where i grew up
i used to ride this in my speedo pretending i was dave scott...